10 September 2009

Europe on five dollars TODAY

Europe on Five Dollars a Day? Not anymore. Here's a list of items that cost five dollars or less in Europe today:
  • 3-5 postcards (they vary from 25 cents to a whole Euro), but only 2 postcards with their relevant stamps
  • Two bottles of water
  • Two croissants or similar pastries
  • A tour of Amsterdam/Berlin/Munich (all free, but a five Euro tip would be considered polite)
  • Approximately one gallon of gasoline.
  • One Doner Kebab, the universal street food of Europe
  • One ride (one way) on the Berlin Super-bahn
  • One half liter of most beer
  • A condom
  • A pregnancy test (from a self-serve vending machine where it is also possible to purchase a prostate exam, though that will cost you more than $5)

And that's about it. Can you tour Europe on five dollars a day? That probably depends on who you give that half liter of beer.


  1. Mmmm, doner kebab... Live on kebabs, sleep in parks, "tour" just one city. There you go!

    I like your sequencing of the last three items.

  2. I'm almost scared to ask, but how exactly does a vending machine prostate exam work? I'm picturing a Inspector Gadget-like arm with gloved robot hand emerging from the machine when you put in your Euros. But that's terrifying. Tell me I'm wrong.

  3. That's correct, Hannah. German engineering is an astonshing thing.

    Actually, it's a stick on which you urinate. They have several such items, including the pregnancy test, a colon cancer test, and various others that I don't recall at the moment.

    Possibly-related true fact: Way back when, some German beer halls had a gutter running the length of the long tables. To urinate, men opened the flap of their lederhosen and let loose, right there at the table. They used their canes to direct the stream.

    Conclusion: Germans enjoy pissing on sticks.

    ... Since you asked.


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